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skeeter777
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- Beaverton, OR
- United States
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I am so happy your story was published!! From the comments I can see that it's really hitting home for a lot of people. I can only hope this is a stepping stone to reform and that every other father jipped out of money and time will have the courage…
I thankfully haven't had to deal as much with this side of it as we're in a joint custody situation with very little child support. And that might be a good suggestion. If the child(ren) is receiving so much support from your household alone, why no…
I think you need to talk to a local lawyer on this one. The law where I live is that my ex husband can't ask me for an accounting of how I spend the child support money. My kids want for nothing, but that's because their SF is very generous. When my…
Unfortunately we have been in the same position, BM was receiving her support and then cried the blues every time some extra expense would come up. Like the others said you ae under no obligation to give anything extra but I do understand what it is…
In Canada, though there is no legal document, Child support is supposed to cover the child's basic needs. Food, clothing, shelter. So shoes are covered. I agree with Karen, send your SS home with the shoes you purchased for him so that you can be as…
If it were me, I would write the next child support check minus the amount you spent on shoes and include a reciept. On the memo line write "as agreed" Worst case: she goes for the short support you owe and you pay intrest on what? $50? Make her fig…
This is one of my favorite topics... notice the dripping sarcasm? BM is the same way; actually, one of my stepsons had a HUGE whole in his shoe when we picked him up from school one day and apparently, he was wearing them like that for over a week.…
Once you hand her that money, you really have NO say in what she does with it! which totally sucks, if she isn't responsible enough to actually use it for her children! The only thing you can do is call CPS. Tell them you know for a fact that she is…
If you're paying child support and she has legal custody of the child, it is her responsibility to buy what the child needs. You are under NO obligation to give her any additional funds. If you do, it's by your own choice. My husbands ex calls and a…
I have spent all day on the phone and am about to throw my hands up. I need information so that we can put BM in her place when she asks for more money or for us to buy things for her house. Yesterday, BM mentioned when we picked up the boys that ou…
I have spent all day on the phone and am about to throw my hands up. I need information so that we can put BM in her place when she asks for more money or for us to buy things for her house. Yesterday, BM mentioned when we picked up the boys that ou…
Last year my SS was in the 1st grade and his behavior was so bad that he was breaking school supplies, that weren't his and being removed from the class because no one wanted to be around him. I found out about it then had to have hubby call his ex…
Profile Information
- Relationship Status:
- Married
- About Me:
- I am 27 and have been in a relationship with my husband for going on 5 years, married Oct. 27 of 09. He had a rough divorce that ended nearly 2 years ago and his ex does everything and anything in her power to undermine our relationship and exclude me from the boys' lives. I love them dearly and I know they love me, their mother tends to make me feel like less of a parent sometimes, even though I know it's not true. I have been working with kids full time for nearly a decade and am in school to become either an addiction counselor, social worker, or step-family focused therapist.
- Number of Stepchildren
- 2
- Custodial or Non-Custodial Stepparent
- Shared Custody
- Do you have biological children of your own?
- Trying to Conceive
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my email addy for facebook is wendaline777@yahoo.com. might be fun to look at everyones pictures :)
Skeeter777's Blog
Help!! child support not being spent properly!
I have spent all day on the phone and am about to throw my hands up. I need information so that we can put BM in her place when she asks for more money or for us to buy things for her house. Yesterday, BM mentioned when we picked up the boys that our oldest needed new shoes. She said she can't buy any until after the new year because she needs to save her money for her trip (she is visiting for her 2nd time her online bf she met --- well, online. haha oh, and leaving on Christmas day btw). She a… Continue
Posted on December 18, 2009 at 5:31pm — 8 Comments
the blame game
Recently both my SS (6 & 8) had parent-teacher conferences. Since my husband has a very odd schedule (he works 4 tens so the boys have him as entirely as possible while they're here 1/2 of every week) he was unable to attend. Of course bio-mom went and only when asked told DH how it went. She barely mentioned our 6 year old who is getting extra tutoring for a speech issue he has, instead opting to recall that our 3rd graders teacher mentioned some issues he is having trying to be a class clo… Continue
Posted on November 6, 2009 at 9:55am — 4 Comments
Comment Wall (7 comments)
- At 2:28am on December 17, 2009,
Roseyblossom said…
- Oh yes my dear, I feel your pain completely as I've been there. Before I started working for the district I volunteered several days a week. I never had a problem with the staff, if she talked bad about me, they never said anything. Anytime I've ever asked how the kids are doing, I always get answers and everyone seems sympathetic of our situation and know we're involved. BM has been angry and requested I not volunteer or go on field trips but I do it anyway....I'm there for all the kids, not just my own. Now, I was heavily involved with the PTO and those people gossip like they're still in junior high. While some people listened to her lies and I was treated like crap, others were much better and I was able to make some friends at the school. We did however, just get home from our 7th graders (my SS) band concert in which she brought the boys too since her visitation time. We attend everything the boys do and we can tell it's hard for the boys because they don't know what to do. They look confused, embarressed and I know they want us there, but they feel cuaght in the middle of us and their mom's complete hatred for us. I feel horrible for them and for what it does to my husband. I can't imagine my kids treating me like that and I just don't know what to do for them.
My hats off to your husband for taking the time to take his kids to school, even when it wasn't his job. It amazes me how those of us work so hard for our kids, to do what's best for them and we get shafted. Yet, those who are not in this for the kids, and only themselves seem to win.
- At 12:31am on December 16, 2009,
- I'm sorry it took em so long to get back to you! How horrible of me! We have 4 of our kids at Greenway and our oldest is at Conestoga. I work up at Oak Hills Elementary and love it! We too just had conferences and we always set up our own. She wants my hubby to go with her and doesn't feel I should be involved since I'm not there Mom. She has issues and feels threatened because I spend so much time at the school. It's not that I'm trying to take her place, I have my own kids there too and it's not fair for me to spend time with mine and not my SS's too. We found out a few weeks ago we're expecting a baby in July, so I'm not sure what type of crap will come up. His youngest (8) was crying Friday because he had to go back to his mom's after school and doesn't think it's fair he doesn't get to see us whenever he wants and they only live 1/2 mile away. I feel bad for my SS's.
- At 11:51pm on November 8, 2009,
- Hang in there Skeeter! I love reading your blogs. We seem to go through the same thing with the BM's we deal with and our SS's. You're doing a great job, you want to be involved and help the kids as well as support your man. Good going chic, you rock!
- At 10:42pm on November 7, 2009,
Gnatto said… - Hi Skeeter. I've updated my profile with soem more info about me and my sitch. Thanks for the friend invite, too.
Natalie
- At 11:56am on October 14, 2009,
Ani said… - Thanks for your story it help in so many ways.....I feel like I'm not alone. Thanks again...hugs Ani
- At 10:18pm on October 8, 2009,
- Hi Skeeter, it's great to hear from you.
Well, I was married for 10 years and had 3 kids. Got divorced in 90 days, it was awesome! We printed out the papers online and did it all on our own in Washington state. Met 2nd hubby during the first month of my divorce process and he who was in the process of his divorce of 14 years (papers filed). His took a year to go through and we went through Washington County. Yes, there is a ton of biased, even when she admits to a Pscyhologist that she tells the boys their dad doesn't love them or let them talk to him on the phone when he calls every night....she got custody. Plus, the mediator told my husband that because he has to pay spousal support, my husband will have too as well. NICE! Yes, the system sucks and we deal with more then enough crap because of it. Oh, well though.
We've been married for 2 years now and talk about having one but we haven't yet and don't know if we will.
Hope to get to talk to you more!
- At 10:41am on September 10, 2009,
Kaiti said… - Hi Skeeter777. I just joined this site too. It sounds like its going to be a great place to get some advice and support. Its already helped me and I hope it does you to. @ : )
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